with Guest Blogger Aline Defiglia LCSW Two people were studying in a small, stuffy room in a University library. One person wanted the window open, one person wanted it closed. Instead of focusing on solutions, (whether the window would be opened or closed) they concentrated on needs and resolved the problem by coming up with another alternative- opening a window in the next room. This provided fresh air for the person who wanted it and, at the same time, prevented the north wind from blowing directly on the person who objected to being in a strong draft.
Is it really possible to craft a win/win method of solving many of the most entrenched interpersonal issues we face? Can we be released from…. win/lose CAPITULATION and DOMINATION? mini-lose/mini-lose COMPROMISE? lose/lose DENIAL and AVOIDANCE? Collaborative problem solving requires the use of listening skills, assertion skills, and the 1-2-3 dialogue or conflict resolution method. Let’s go through the six-step process step by step. Pay attention to the common pitfalls of using this method!
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with Guest Blogger Aline Defiglia LCSW When people get emotionally escalated, they are actually fundamentally different people than when they are calm.
with Guest Blogger Aline Defiglia LCSW Hearing + suspenseful waiting = Listening “True human sincerity, true transparency…It is a rare and difficult thing; and so much of it depends on the person who is listening to us!
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